Wildfox Can’t Stop, Won’t Stop (With the Statement Tees)

TGIF, party animals. Another Friday means another installment of Catalog Police, our weekly discussion of the latest catalogs, and how they’re blinding humanity one page at a time.

This week, we’ll be looking at Wildfox’s latest lookbook for its spring collection. It’s all the wacky slogan tees, statement sweatshirts and bizarrely sexual imagery we’ve come to now and love.

Let’s dive in:

luxury

The 80s called, and it wants its yuppie-dom back. (Seriously, add in Molly Ringwald, and it’s Stef’s house party in Pretty in Pink.)

crabs

This crab jumpsuit screams: “Insert your favorite STD joke here!”

nyisfor

Yes? NY is for WHAT?! Don’t leave me hanging.

mojito

This T-shirt is the perfect “why have’t you graduated yet?” gift for the train wreck in your life.

bathtub

Whoa. Getting a little Lifetime movie-ish up in here. I don’t have a good feeling about how this will end.